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nto the water next to the fish with a loud "sploosh!"
Distracted by this shiny object, the fish made a sudden lunge,
simultaneously snapping the line, and swallowing the watch. Sadly,
the fisherman stared into the water, and then began the slow trip back
home.
Many years later, the fisherman, now an old man, was working
in a boring assembly-line job in a large city. He worked in a
fish-processing plant. It was his job, as each fish passed under his
hands, to chop off their heads, readying them for the next phase in
processing. This monotonous task went on for years, the dull *thud*
of the cleaver chopping of each head being his entire world, day after
day, week after weary week. Well, one day, as he was chopping fish,
he happened to notice that the fish coming towards him on the line
looked very familiar. Yes, yes, it looked... could it be the fish he
had lost on that day so many years ago? He trembled with anticipation
as his cleaver came down. IT STRUCK SOMETHING HARD! IT WAS HIS
THUMB!
%
A doctor calls his patient to give him the results of his
tests. "I have some bad news," says the doctor, "and some worse
news." The bad news is that you only have six weeks to live."
"Oh, no," says the patient. "What could possibly be worse
than that?"
"Well," the doctor replies, "I've been trying to reach you since
last Monday."
%
Seems George was playing his usual eighteen holes on Saturday
afternoon. Teeing off from the 17th, he sliced into the rough over
near the edge of the fairway. Just as he was about to chip out, he
noticed a long funeral procession going past on a nearby street.
Reverently, George removed his hat and stood at attention until the
procession had passed. Then he continued his game, finishing with a
birdie on the eighteenth. Later, at the clubhouse, a fellow golfer
greet George. "Say, that was a nice gesture you made today, George.
"What do you mean?" asked George.
"Well, it was nice of you to take off your cap and stand
respectfully when that funeral went by," the friend replied.
"Oh, yes," said George. "Well, we were married 17 years, you
know."
%
"How'd you get that flat?"
"Ran over a bottle."
"Didn't you see it?"
"Damn kid had it under his coat."
%
A mathematician, a doctor, and an engineer are walking on the beach
and observe a team of lifeguards pumping the stomach of a drowned
woman. As they watch, water, sand, snails and such come out of the
pump.
The doctor watches for a while and says: "Keep pumping, men,
you may yet save her!!"
The mathematician does some calculations and says: "According
to my understanding of the size of that pump, you have already pumped
more water from her body than could be contained in a cylinder 4 feet
in diameter and 6 f 上一页 [1] [2] [3] [4] [5] [6] [7] [8] [9] [10] ... 下一页 >>
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